Butt down, Eyes out

Hmmm . . . now what do you think that post means?!

Well, for one this baby is BREECH! Yes, her cute little butt is squished down in my pelvis and unless we can get her to turn that means I get a C-section in a couple weeks.

Second health-related news of the week is that B will probably have to have eye surgery as she has two "lazy" eyes. They tend to rotate out. We're trying "the patch" for 6 weeks to see if it helps at all. But who knows. So please keep a little prayer in your heart especially for Bells as this is pretty hard for her (she cries every day over this).

BUT, to add some humor to the situation, I'm listing here some of the "17 Ways to Turn a Breech Baby" (courtesy http://pregnancychildbirth.suite101.com/article.cfm/turning_a_breech_baby). I guess you do whatever you can do. But see if you find them as humorous as I do at 9 mos pregnant. I chose the best to share:

#3. Headstand - with assistance and in a pool frequently as possible. (Hello?!)

#4. Breech Tilt - begin at 32-35 weeks gestation. Do 3 times daily for 10-15 minutes each time, when you have an empty stomach, and the baby is active. Prop one end of an ironing board securely on a sofa or chair 12 to 18 inches high (or may use slant board). Lie down, bend knees but keep feet flat on board . . . Gravity pushes the baby's head into the fundus, tucks it, and baby can then do a somersault to a vertex position. (I believe Lynnsey said she would pay to see me do this . . .)

#5. CD/iPod headphones - place them inside mom's pants toward her pubic bone and play classical music for 10 minutes 6-8 times a day. (Anyone have an Ipod I can use?!)

#6. Flashlight - try moving slowly down from the top of the uterus toward your pubic bone while you are in a breech tilt position. (So not only will I be upside down on an ironing board--but with a flashlight making runway signals--Steph I could use some help with this airline maneuver).

#8. Clothespin - place on the small toe of each foot at the outside corner of the toenail; sideways so that the toenail and toepad are stimulated for 30 minutes per day, this is an acupressure point that is a "moving down" point. (ouch!)

#11. Pelvic Tilt- with an ICE PACK (Hello?!!) on the top of your tummy on an empty stomach, 10 minutes twice a day. Do this while lying on your back on the floor with knees flexed and feet on the floor with three large pillows placed under your buttocks. Try this in conjunction with headphones and visualization. (cold)

#14. Belly Relaxing followed by Inversion - Partner places a sheet or towel under mom's hips as she lays on the floor. Lift up on the corners of the cloth and shimmy her from side to side moving your hands up and down to wiggle her belly from side to side. These should be very small movements which mom should find very relaxing. Do this for about 5 minutes. Then mother kneels on the stairway landing. Walk your hands down 2 or 3 stairs into an all fours position; have your partner support your shoulders to balance you. Remain in this position for about 5-10 minutes or as long as comfortable. Also do this on an empty stomach. (Umm . . . can we say Not Relaxing)

I will plead the 5th when asked if I have done any of these. But let's just say if I call to borrow an ice pack, head phones, an ironing board and clothespin, or to use your pool--JUST SAY NO.